Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
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