So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
