So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
