Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
