I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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