If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
