Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
should my penis look like a turkey
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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