I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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