I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
