I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
