There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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