our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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