Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
