ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
