pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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