Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
