Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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