then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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