She went from zero to smokin in five shots
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
