Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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