Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
