my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
