Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
