Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
