two words...techno handjob
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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