Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize