Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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