I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
