2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize