Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
