I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
