there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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