Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
then he tried to convert me to islam
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
