I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Randomize
