You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
