found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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