All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
