Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
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