..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
