oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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