they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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