I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
