There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
