talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
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