DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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