And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
