The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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