Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
