Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
