That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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