just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize