You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
